Self Sufficiency

Having extreme confidence
in one’s own resources,
to become independent.

My feeding tube was removed this week. The doctor yanked it out of my stomach with his hands. The soreness lasted for three days and I had the hiccups all afternoon and evening.

Self sufficiency is no longer about contributing to the livelihood of a family. Finacial independence, working to acquire a house or car, pursuing an education. I wonder if I can ever achieve these goals again.

Self sufficiency has become living at your mothers home, having people drive you to doctor and therapy appointments, the grocery store, or just a haircut and to buy clothes.

Relying on the city bus. Giving myself time and a half to accomplish things. Surrendering to fatigue and sleeping in the afternoon for a few 2-3 two to three hours. Finding quiet so I can think at my own pace.

Keeping things easy if I want to accomplish anything. Giving-up self sufficiency.